February 19 2021 – Mariesa Crowder
Self care seems like a bit of slogan nowadays. It only requires 30 seconds of scrolling through instagram to be bombarded with some prettied up self care quote (which I am also guilty of posting btw.)
It seems like self care has almost become a marketing ploy to sell journals or life coaching sessions, and in the process of that, it’s significance and meaning has been diluted. But the importance of self care and it’s role in maintaining our mental health should not be undermined. And in the same way that our personal self care practises should be maintained and kept in check, so too should our sexual self care.
As women we are conditioned to take care of every other part of ourselves, our nails, our hair, our teeth, our feet, our finances… the list goes on. But nowhere are we taught to take care of our vagina’s. In fact our sexual self care generally implies something traumatic that involves visiting a gynaecologist or having a smear test, or deciding on what contraception we should use. But why is it that our yoni’s aren’t given the same care and attention as other parts of our anatomy or our lives?
Women are the most magical creatures. Our bodies are the vessels in which life is formed. Our yoni’s are the gateway to the source of all creation and our wombs are a place where all life begins. However, at no point in our education, either schooling or throughout life, are we given guidance on how we must nourish and pay attention to this incredible part of our bodies.
Through centuries of our patriarchal societies, our bodies have been commoditised and sanctioned, sexualised and shamed, is it any wonder that as women we feel completely disconnected to our own bodies. Our cultures have conditioned us to view our sexuality as being for somebody else. A woman’s sexuality up until recently has been regarded solely as a source for male pleasure and has never been for us to enjoy. As a result of this many women have experienced trauma or abuse on some level at some point in their lives in relation to their sexuality. When we’ve suffered abuse or trauma our coping mechanism is to dissociate and disconnect from the place that causes this pain. This makes us not go there and pay attention and inhabit that part of our body.
What is a sexual self care practise?
A sexual self care practise is about reconnecting to our bodies and our yoni’s in particular, lifting the shame that we’ve been made to feel about our genitals and rewiring the neurological pathways between our brain and our bodies so that we can become more receptive to pleasure, touch and feeling in our yoni’s. The idea is to create a daily practise so that it becomes natural and instinctive to experience pleasure and enjoy our sexuality.
Many women suffer from pelvic floor dysfunctions and experience issues like vaginal numbness, prolapse, incontinence or pain or discomfort during sex. All of these pelvic floor issues arise because of disconnect with your body. A yoni egg and crystal wand practise can not only prevent a lot of these issues, but depending on what stage they’re at can heal them. A sexual self care practise is an empowering and safe way for you as a women to reconnect to your vagina and reclaim it as something that is yours.
How can a Yoni Egg or Crystal Wand make you feel more connection to your body?
The wand and yoni egg work by creating dexterity, suppleness and strength in your vagina. Most women have either over tense muscles which are full of tension and cannot release, or they have muscles which are completely weak with no strength in them. The combination of the egg and wand practise allows you to cultivate strength so that your vaginal muscles can come back to their full range of motion.
Just as you train your muscles in the gym, the muscles in our yoni’s will benefit from regular training. As well as allowing the muscles to become healthy and strong and supple, by doing a yoni egg practise or a Yoni massage with a Crystal wand, you are increasing the blood flow and oxygen to this area. A lot of women are living with numbness in their vaginas where they cannot feel anything inside, and it’s mainly due to the fact that they simply never touch themselves internally. So by doing a self care practices with the yoni egg and the crystal wand, you are increasing the blood flow in the area and activating all of the glands inside the vagina which are responsible for internal orgasms.
There are many exercises that you can do through touch and breath work and personal exploration that will help you discover your own sexual self care practise and over the coming weeks in this blog I will be sharing some of them with you.
The yoni egg and wand is a holistic practise that not only helps us prevent pelvic floor dysfunctions and helps you become more orgasmic, but it also allows us to reconnect with our sexuality on an energetic and emotional level in a very safe way. Our sexuality is a skill and an art that like anything in life, you can become a master of.